Sorry for such a heavy post–but it is what is on my mind…
Adoption is part of our life. A huge part and talking about it is also part of our life. I have been too busy to pay much attention to what is going on in Haiti. I am not oblivious but without radio/npr in my car, I don’t get much news in my life–as well life it just busy. Yesterday, I was driving to teach in the am and was listening to NPR–I have a loaner car while mines getting body work done–oh how I miss NPR each day. So, I was listening to NPR and they were talking about the devastation in Haiti and about mothers giving up or trying to give up their children before and after the earthquake. This is not a new phenomena to me–I understand that isn’t the right word–I can’t even begin to understand the desperation these women and families feel in these developing/impoverished countries feel and experience.
They were talking about the surge in women attempting to give their children away for adoption in the aftermath of the earthquake as most people houses and jobs have been destroyed and lost. How completely bleak it much feel when you see no tangible way to provide food, clothes, shelter for your children. They had a Haitian woman’s sound byte about her attempts to give up her four children because she sees no way to feed them or take care of them. At this point, I lost it and the tears came out in a flood. I had to pull over in a parking lot. It saddened me so much that these people are living in such a state of utter destruction that they cannot see how they can keep their own children. It really hit home, as I can infer that this is how my kids birthmoms must have felt. It saddens me to think that any parent give up their child when they are healthy simply because they feel they cannot provide for them. It is overwhelming and reminds me of the other side of adoption. The one we rarely talk about–it is a blessing for me as an infertile–but for those who surrender their children based on a feeling of desperation, it must leave a whole in their heart and soul that can never be filled.
As grateful as I am, I am also sad. My thoughts are with all of the mothers who have sacrificed their parenthood to “give” their children a better life. I hope to make you proud.
This post was previously published on my personal blog